My self-summary
(Hints: Your passions in life, what makes you a great partner, etc.)
My passion in life? Writing I guess and rescuing cats and painting, drawing, sewing, gardening, and photography.
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I will give you fair warning, you are going to find out about this sooner or later so you might as well know about it straight off first thing to get it out of the way: I come from a hugely messed up background and my giant multi-generational polygamous and incestuous family of 260+ members was involved in several murder/suicide cults including Heaven's Gate. I escaped from a cult compound and am trying to live a normal live in spite of my past. I grew up on the compound, I did not attend school, I had no contact with non-compound/non-Mormons for the first 27 years of my life. I did not know people from "the outside world" lived vastly different lives that how I was raised. I did not know there existed such things as freedom of speech, choices, woman's rights, or that woman could do things such as attend school, wear pants, cut their hair, and get jobs. I was raised in a very male dominated and highly female degraded mini-culture. I did not know there were alternative options to the way I was raised, though I did know I hated their lifestyle and desired more than anything the freedom to do...well...anything at all.
I'm very big on loyalty and faithfulness, I am perfectly happy to spend my entire life with one man. I've only been in one relationship my whole life, we were together 24 years and well, he ended it not me. I still love him, I miss him, I wanted to repair our relationship, but it's been 8 years and I need to try to move on now.
And yes you DID read those numbers right, I'm 35 years old and was with a guy 24 years who left me 8 years ago - it was an arranged Mormon marriage (which I now know was not legal). I was not given a choice in the matter (I was a baby for crying out loud!) and I have never once in my entire life been on a date as I grew up from my childhood believing I was the "ordained wife" of a priest 30 years older than me, and have never been with anyone else, though I was raised believing I was his wife, I have since learned that there was no actual marriage and the whole thing was an illegal sham. Needless to say I no longer belong the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints as now that I know this sort of arranged marriage thing is not normal or even legal, of course I found this out by the Church excommunicating me thus the reason why he dropped me, I've grown disgusted with the entire LDS religion.
I'll point out here that I have Autism and can be somewhat slow in laws and understanding social matters as a result, I grew up on an isolated cult compound, and I was this man's "wife/sex toy" since my very early childhood. Basically I was a sex slave, that was born, breed, and raised to be a child sex slave, and I was never taught anything otherwise, until suddenly the Mormon Church excommunicated me -but not him- because of the lifestyle I was raised as. I still live by VERY strongly Mormon beliefs and feel that the Church's decision to excommunicate me was a case of punishing the victim to protect the guilty. I don't know if what happened to me could be considered rape or not as I was too young to know of rape and was never told I had a choice or the right to say no.
In any case, I loved, adored, and respected this man with all my heart and soul, I would have done anything for him. We had a very good relationship, I had no complaints with it. I thought he loved me and care for me as I did him, but I see now that was not the case. I know now that I was nothing more than a play thing to him, easily abandoned, tossed aside, and thrown away the second the Church ordered him to do so. 24 years together meant nothing to him. It is for this reason I today will not get involved with a man who is what I term "religion crazy". I will not get into another relationship with a man who puts God and/or religion before his wife. I don't want a repeat of last time: in other words, if your church tells you to get rid of your wife because they don't like her for whatever reason, I'd expect you to tell the church to go to hell because you are keeping your wife.
But so, there you have it. Out front in the open, no secrets, no surprises down the road. I believe that before you get into a relationship you should know a person's past and well, that's mine. By getting it out in the open now before you meet me, there's no risk of a major shock when you find out about it later on.
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Okay, that out of the way... now you know where I came from, let's not mention it again, because I want to put my past behind me, so moving on to who and what I am today...
I am homeless. Or rather I am houseless the world is my home. I used to have a house by my relatives did not take kindly to my getting out on my own and leaving "The Family" so they burned it down and so I don't have to go through that sort of thing again, I no longer live in a house at all. We did not exactly live in a house when I grew up, so, it's no big deal for me to not live in one now. I spent 3 years living in the cold North Atlantic coast on a beach under a 8x6 tarp. I survived 3 blizzards under that tarp - just me, 9 cats, a dog, and 2 sub-zero sleeping bags one inside the other. Before that I lived 9 years in a 1964 Dodge along with 2 dogs and 3 cats, and later 8 dogs. Currently it is me and 14 cats living in a 30 year old Volvo and have been these past 4 years. By 2012 it's going to be me, 14 cats, and 2 dog living in a 31 foot motor-home. Also, I'm a girl who dresses like a drag queen and prefer to spend my time with drag queens (unfortunately they all seem to be gay, which is okay for them, but kind of sucks for me seeing how I'm a girl and they like guys). I need a guy who is okay with this kind of lifestyle, better yet if he is a straight drag queen himself, has a few cats of his own, and wants to live this kind of nomadic houseless lifestyle with me - now THAT's the type of guy I'd even consider marrying. (Though as you could imagine from what I said above about my past "arranged marriage" I am some what not in any sort of hurry to be married at all. The thought of marriage leaves a bad taste in my mouth, and a committed life partner is probably a better road for me to take, should that sort of relationship develop.)
I was raised/trained to be a "faithful servant" who waits on her man hand and foot, cooking, sewing, cleaning house, messaging his tired muscles, and over all being a "dutiful help mate" as I was called, in addition to just plain being silently obedient to his every sexual whim as well. That said I tend to gravitate towards a somewhat BDSM relationship and I am a VERY willing victim/submissive/slave. I would actually PREFER to be in a life-long permanent relationship with a drag queen/transvestite dominatrix/master. But there in lies the thing: I really need to trust a man before I'll even let him hold my hand let alone hug me or even think about sex. I do have trust issues as a result of my past and I am trying to work on them, but you'll have to be patent and prove I can trust you. So yeah, sex would go to a BDSM level but it'll be a year or two or more of me getting to know you as a friend, before you could even think about trying to advance to a sexual relationship with me.
I am looking for a friend, someone to have fun with and spend time with, possibly a travel partner for a 5 to 10 year long RV road trip, with a hope that maybe something develops from there. So friend first, maybe for a few years, before the move turns to sexual relationship. I don't do well with short term relationships - I really need to develop a trust in my partner and I can't do that with a short term relationship. I'm some one who jumps in for the long haul. I'm looking for a relationship I can expect will last for the rest of my/your life. You will find that once the trust bond is there I will become your very faithfully devoted servant.
I do have a wild stubborn streak though and need my alone time.
I need a guy who, like myself can go from a best dressed (over dressed?) black tie event to a grubby natural disaster rescue operation: in other words flexible, know how to look good when you need to but not be a afraid to jump head first into a dirty mess. Some one who can go from a night on the town to a hike in the forest at the drop of a pin. Someone who can put up with my wild spur of the moment changes which result in me dressed in velvet ball gowns with wading through peat bog swamps (a thing I often do: wear ball gowns while wading through swamps - I love ball gowns. I love swamps. I spend a lot of time in ball gowns - every day all day long actually, and No I DO NOT own any normal cloths. I also spend a lot of time in swamps chasing frogs, photographing flowers and water currents. I'm not afraid to dress like Liberace, nor am I afraid to get my cloths soaking wet and dripping in mud.) Think of me as a 2 year old girl who like dressing up as a Disney Princess while jumping in mud puddles and playing in the sand box, because that's EXACTLY who I am.
What I’m doing with my life
I'd just like to add...
(Hints: Interests you hope to share, ingredients of a great relationship, anything important you haven’t mentioned.)
I have 14 cats. I'm saving up for an RV (motorhome) and starting in 2012 me and my 14 cats are going to live full time in the RV while visiting all 50 states and Canada too. I am self employed: I write books, short stories and articles and do acrylic, pastle, and watercolor paintings, and do nature/travel photography. I am a professional Hoodoo Rootworker, card reader, and Christo-Pagan minister and run a coven (in other words a Christian and pagan witch of sorts). I was raised Mormon and still live a "Mormon lifestyle" but no longer follow any religion. I'm also a vegetarian animal rights activist. I run a feral cat rescue.
As my childhood was devoid of an education, I have been slowly getting one. Finally at the age of 34 I got my GED. I've been taking college courses off and on (random stand alone courses and online courses). I've been working as a part time temp at Macy's and as an Avon Sales Representative. Both incomes are small and sporadic, and I am searching for a better job and hoping to get a job which I can take on the road with my in an RV, something in sales and retail or an inventory service for places like WalMart maybe.
I've not yet the finances to attend college full time, but that is my goal. I would like to eventually go the Harvard and get a PhD in Psychology and become a counselor for women who've survived abusive situations.
I believe with my background, I have much to offer to help women in similar situations. I know where they are coming from. I know how hard it is to escape abuse. I know how hard it is to pick up the pieces and start your life all over again from scratch. I am living proof that it can be done. I am a survivor and I want to help other survive.
Additionally I would like to attend Harvard for an English PhD so that I can substitute teach high school English and Literature and Creative Writing in schools as I travel the USA in my RV. I really like reading and writing a lot. To date I have written and published: 30+ books, 200+ short stories, and 2,000+ articles. I am a very successful and prolific writer (I just wish writing was a job that paid enough to live off just my writing alone!) But I feel it is something I could teach quite well.
I have come a long way in a few years. Ten years ago I never would have imagined I had the option to go to school, drive a car, or get a job. I was raised to believe a woman who did these things was evil and would be condemned by God for such wickedness. I never believed such things, but I also never dared hope I had the option to try such things for myself. Look at me now doing all three!
And I like that I am doing this all on my own, without a man. You see, looking back I see that is one way in which I had no freedom - he provided everything I needed, always and used it as a threat to control me. But when he abandoned me on the Church's orders, he left me with nothing but the cloths on my back, my 9 cats, my dog, 2 sleeping bags, and a 8x6 tarp. I had never seen the world outside the compound before. I had no idea how to get food or shelter. I had no social skills. With my Autism I could barely speak a full sentence. I had no idea I could try to get a job (because I did not think females were allowed to do that.) And I lived under that tarp for 3 years before the State sent me to a psychologist, who diagnosed my as "an Autistic Feral Child". That was in 2005. And yet, here I am, just 6 years later: talking, heading a local writers group, working, studying, driving, and steadily on my way to becoming a "regular citizen" with all the freedoms and rights I now know I should have had all along!
I've come so far in 6 years, just wait till you see me 10 years from now, because now that I've started progressing I've no plans to stop. I am going to live my life to the fullest and be all that I can be. I feel like I wasted the first 27 years of my life and I don't intend to waste another second of it.
I’m really good at
I'm an author, artist, feral cat rescuer, I am a 12 time entrant of the Offices of Letters and Light writing contests (Script Frenzy and National Novel Writing Month, as well as being one of their forum moderators, I am the Script Frenzy Municipal Liaison for Southern Maine (which means I head/plan/organize the weekly writing meetings for the Maine division of their writer's group), of the 12 OLL contests I have entered I am a 2 time Screnzy winner and 5 time NaNoWriMo winner. I am the creator of The Twighlight Manor series. I write horror, gothic romance, science fiction, paranormal erotica (think vampires and stuff), BDSM Gorn ( violent gore filled slasher porn )and dark fantasy in the form of books, novellas, short stories, plays, and comic books. Most of what I write in M-Rated and several of my books are banned, and Christians have been known to take great delight in gathering up and burning any book with my name on it. Ironically in addition to my hard core stuff, I also write children's books.
My next writing project includes a series of coffee table nature and travel photography books which I will be both writing and photographing.
Other things I'm good at include: designing clothes and patterns, and sew them; raising animals, cooking, hand-sewing, being a web master or web mistress.
I'm somewhat of a major computer geek as in I write codes and java scripts and I have built over 200 web sites and over a dozen forums.
I'm also a Whovian geek and a Trekkie geek and a video game geek and a D&D RPG geek (as well as being a DM )and a comic book geek and a CosPlayer.
I kind of score way over 100% on geek scales graph of geekiness.
The first things people usually notice about me
The way I'm dressed. Yes, take a good long hard look at my profile pictures. No I am not on my way to a Renaissance Faire. Nope I'm not LARPing either.
No, this is NOT a costume. Yes, these ARE my normal cloths. No, I do not own any "normal" clothes.
Yes I do wear dresses and full length ball gowns every day of the year and I have done so my entire life. No I do not own any pants, jeans, t-shirts, or what ever else it is you consider to be "normal" modes of dress.
Yes, I know I'm weird, thank you.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
books: Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck by Don Rosa, Hitchhicker's Guide to the Galaxy, Phantom of the Opera, Island of Dr. Moreau, Treasure Island, The Masque of the Red Death, the Retief series, and pretty much all books in general both fiction and non-fiction. I spend many hours a week at any one of five local libraries. I do a lot of reading.
movies: DuckTales, Harry Potter, Phantom of the Opera (2005), Phantom of the Opera (1989), Dark Crystal, Labyrinth, Saw, 2001 Maniacs, Star Trek, Star Wars, Cube, Secret Window, Sense and Sensibility, Pit and the Pendulum, House on Haunted Hill, Love Bug, Herbie Rides Again, Arsanic and Old Lace, Pirates of the Caribbean, Muppets Treasure Island, Treasure Island (with Charlton Heston), Princess Bride, Oliver, Brigadoon, The Heiress, 1776, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Star Wars series, Indiana Jones series, Sherlock Holmes (the Jeremy Brett series), most every Disney classic cartoon movie, b&w serials (such as Zorro's Fighting Legion, The Phantom Empire, or The Undersea Kingdom ) old black & white classics, musicals, as well as certain horror and science fiction movies. Actually movies in general: I'll watch most any movie.
cartoons: InuYasha, DuckTales, Darkwing Duck, Disney Classic Cartoons, Donald Duck shorts, Smurfs, Scooby-Doo and the list goes on and on to include most every Saturday Morning cartoon every made. I like cartoons a lot.
music: Liberace, Marilyn Manson, Falco, SOaD, Serj Tankian, C.C.DeVille, David Bowie, Nightwish, Disturbed, Rob Zombie, Alice Copper, Poison, Rossini, Samantha 7, Lee Liberace, classical music, Bruce Anthony Johannesson, Tin Machine, Edvard Greig, Bon Jovi, Guns N Roses and others...
foods: I'm a vegetarian (but still eat cheese, milk, honey, and eggs), I'd have to say my favorite food is ice cream...we eat it almost every day, I also love pizza, pickles, rice dishes, pasta dishes, most every vegetable (esp. fresh from the garden), fruit...esp. apples, grapes, plums, pineapple, mango,peaches, blueberries, blackberries, strawberries, watermelon, lemons, and pomergranets, I drink tea, Moxie, grape soda, chocolate milk, and fruit juices, and I love bakeing...esp. pies, cookies, cakes, breads, ect.
authors: Don Rosa, Carl Barks, Douglas Adams, Edgar Allan Poe, Kieth Laumer, H.G.Wells, J.K Rowlings, Dr. Suess, Eric Carl, Robert Louis Stevenson, James Blish, Orson Scott Card and many more
fictional characters: Uncle Scrooge McDuck, Lord Sesshomaru, Jack Sparrow, Willy Wonka, Flintheart Glomgold, Eric/the Phantom of the Opera, Prof. Severus Snape, Darkwing Duck, Col. Brandon
actors: Vincent Price, Johnny Depp, Alan Rickman, Bela Lugosi, Cary Grant, Peter Lorre, Jeremy Brett, Bruce Campbell, Eddie Izzard, Robert Englund, John Inman
TV shows: Dr. Who (old and new), Star Trek (the original series), X-files, Xena, The Price is Right, Colombo, Monk, Angel, Charmed, CSI Miami, Cleopatra 2525, Jack of All Trades
flowers: Irises esp. purple and brown ones, blue roses, wildflowers
animals: eels, roosters, rays and skates, birds, cats, fish, horses and most every other animal there is. I would like to some day have a deep see green Moray Eel which is my favorite animal of all.
The six things I could never do without
#1 my massive collection of Scrooge McDuck comic books
#2 my pets---over 2,000 of them in the past 30+ years~~bantams, cats, dog, fish, birds, etc. Currently I have 14 cats.
#3 my books--over 5,000 of them
#4 the beach
#5 nature as in gardens, trees and forest
#6 and of course my 3 little brothers
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Additional note:
I AM someone who needs a great deal of alone time - as a writer I HATE to have any one in the same room with me when I write. I also do daily 1-4 hour long meditation sessions and they work best alone. I want a close loving relationship, but I need space to breath too - spend lots of time with me but don't smother me and need to spend every second with me. Heck, you need your own alone time too you know!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Spiritual stuff, the nature of God, WWJD (What would Jesus do?), paranormal stuff such as UFOs, aliens, alien abductions, angels, faeries, fairy, ghosts, bigfoot, and things of that nature. (Uhm...if you knew my real name and did a Google search of me you would find out that I am one of the world's top UFOlogists and preach some very outlandish theories regarding God being an alien and Jesus being an Alien-Human hybrid. Think of me as being a real life Fox Muldar and you'd be just about right.)
I'm an ordained minister (yeah as in there is the word "Reverend" in front of my name) so I think a lot about life, the universe, and everything contemplating why we are here and writing sermons about it. It's a MAJOR part of my life. Really, really, really, REALLY BIG part of my life.
Also I run a coven (Laughing Gnome Hollow) so you need to be okay with that too, because that is a HUGE part of my life.
You kind of need to be okay with me being a former Mormon turned non-denominational Christian minister heavily inspired by Pentecostal Holy Roller Evangelists as well as my being a Scottish Traveler Pagan Hedgewitch and also being a Hoodoo Rootworker (aka Voodoo Witch Doctor) because this is something that takes up a good 75% of how I spend my days and you'll have to deal with listening to me doing a lot of random talking and theorizing on various spiritual and religious topics on a daily basis.
On a typical Friday night I am
On FaceBook, Twitter, FarmVille, or here.
I spend most of my free time online and the best way to get to know me is to interact with me via social networking.
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Find me and friend me @
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twitter.com/eelkat
facebook.com/eelkat
squidoo.com/eelkat
myspace.com/eelkat
etsy.com/shop/eelkat
zazzle.com/eelkat
associatedcontent.com/eelkat
hubpages.com/profile/EelKat
laughinggnomehollow.proboards.comyoutube.com/eelkat
facebook.com/pages/Rev-Wendy-C-Allen/327178886332?sk=wall
I'm not always online during my free time though...
I could be reading a book or watching a DVD.
Dungeons and Dragons is possible as I am a Dungeon Master and usually am playing an Illithid with a pet Green Jello Cube somewhere in the SpellJammer or Castle Ravenloft universe.
I would like to go dancing, but have never been.
Sometimes I head over to Pizza by Michael in Saco.
Sometimes I head over to the Tin-Tin all you can eat buffet in Biddeford.
Dave's Sub Shop in Old Orchard Beach is a common place for me to be.
Other times it'll be SubWay, Dairy Queen, Bill's Pizza, Pier Fries, McDonalds, Wendy's, Burger King, Pizza Hut, or Panera Bread.
In the morning you'd find me at The Golden Rooster also in Saco.
As you can tell, I don't do fancy restaurants (they are a bit out of my current price range, but I wouldn't mind going to one for a "special night") and I tend to stick to the small local mom`N`pop cafes or the fast food joints.
During the day I'd be working in the gardens at Laughing Gnome Hollow, walking on the beach, meditating, or hiking in the forest.
I'm more likely to stay in and be surrounded by my 14 cats while I read a book, rather than go out at all though. I cook in more than I eat out. I prefer quiet time. Casual meals. Game nights (board games, video games, and RPG games) are my favored night time activity. I'm not into the whole "night life" scene and I've never been to a bar not once in my whole life.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
You mean other than what I said already about my past history?
I'm a huge life long Liberace fan. (Yes, I remember when he was alive and I was one of those crazy screaming women dieing to marry him all those years ago - told you I was old!) Extreme Liberace fan, to the point that I dress just like him, capes instead of coats, dripping in feathers, fur, and sequins, all day, every day. No, this is NOT a costume. Yes, these ARE my normal cloths. No, I do not own any "normal" clothes. Yes, I know I'm weird, thank you. (And no, I never got married, I'm still single, and yes, it's because I'm still madly in love with the crazy gay pianist of the 1950s...he was my first love, and did I mention how REALLY obsessed I am with Liberace?)
And as a shocking surprise to people I meet: I'm homeless. I live on a beach (Old Orchard Beach). Once upon a time I lived in a house on the beach, but a flood came and took the house with it. For many years I lived under a 8x6 tarp, known to locals as "The tent of Old Orchard Beach". For the last 5 years, I've lived in a 1992 Volvo. I'm saving up for an RV. People ask me, but don't you want to go back to living in a house? No. Not really. Been there, done that, and I wasn't really happy back than. Becoming homeless, was stressful, unexpected, nerve wracking, and in the end: the best thing that ever happened to me. It opened my eyes to a new view of the world around me, brought me closer to God and nature, and I am happier now than I ever was before. In the early days of being homeless I was pissed and couldn't wait to get back in a house, but now I'm free as a bird going where ever I want, whenever I want, and living where ever the mode strikes me. I've evolved into a wandering nomad and I love it!
I’m looking for
Guys who like girls
Ages 35-75
Located anywhere
Who are single
For new friends, long-term dating, activity partners
You should message me if
If you think retiring from "normal lifestyles", buying an RV and driving around the country with 14 cats and a couple of dogs, geocaching, hiking, sleeping under the stars, living in a tent , contemplating why we are here on Earth, meditating, chasing UFOs, exploring beaches and visiting State Parks and National Parks while making a living with nature photography, travel photography, writing for travel guides, and giving psychic readings, and living life full-timing it as an RVer, sounds like fun to you. (You REALLY NEED to be okay with living in an RV motorhome if you plan to be with me, seeing as, well I'm a fulltimer, and if you don't know what the word fulltimer or fulltiming means, than you might want to rethink why you are messaging me, savvy?
(I once lived in a tent or rather it was a 8x6 tarp tied down over a wood pile, in the winter in Maine on a beach during a blizzard at -48F, so be prepaired for some extreme living, and know that when I say extreme, I do mean EXTREME, I prefer the cold weather, I live for fog rolling in off the ocean, I love the winter, I often walk barefoot in the snow, I am deeply fully in love with being at one with nature on the utmost extreme levels, when I say I boondock off the grid I mean I REALLY boondock deep and far off the grid with a brook for running water and a tree for a toilet and not a tv, phone, or eletrical outlet for miles - I don't own a phone by the way, don't believe in them - know that and know that this is how I live my life and I will not be changing this or settling down in any sort of "normal" house dwelling lifestyle.)
Oh yeah and I also dress like a drag queen ready for Las Vegas stage while I'm living like this. You won't see me with any hiking gear or backpacks (unless I find one made of sequins of course). I am a person of many extremes.
Think of my life as one big road trip traveling on the road 24/7/365 in a one person carnival side show decked out in velvet and lace and glitter and sequins. Oh and did I mention I an a Natural Born Gypsy. Yeah, explains a lot I suppose. I'm a Scottish Traveler. Do you think you can be okay with that?
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You should also message me if you want to feel like this (or can make me feel like this!):
Love is when you miss him even before he's gone,
When you could listen to him talk all night
And never get tired of hearing his voice,
When the sound of his name sends chills down your spine,
And when you see his smile the second you close your eyes!
~ Adriene Auckerman ~
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You should really really message me if:
You are a drag queen or transvestite AND you match the rest of this "message me if" section.
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About the man I'm looking for...
(Hints: Key personality traits, values, relationship priorities, etc.)
Likes animals, esp cats and dogs, is vegetarian, is spiritual but not overly "religion crazy", if already has pets even better! No smoking, no drinking, no drugs. I actually have a preferance for drag queens and transvestites. Kind of needs to be okay with "houseless living" ie living off the grid, camping, tent living, boondocking, van dwelling, full time RV living, ect. as I've not lived in a house in many years and no plans to do so at any point either. Likes beaches and forests as I spend most of my life on the beach or exploring forest trails and leisurely geocache hiking with dogs..
